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| maria84 |
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| Joined: 21 Jan 2012 |
| Posts: 239 |
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 Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 12:50 pm |
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I decided today that I would start letting my employer know what’s going on as regarding my IVF journey, I have a very physical job and all this treatment will have a effect on my work, I work for quite a large company and we have a union so in one sense I’m really lucky and there are various procedures in place for any person who has IVF.
However my union member is male as is my manger and it is so embarrassing discussing it with them. They have no idea what I’m talking about most of the time. They want exact dates for when I will off work for scans, egg collection and so on, but it’s really hard to explain to, two men that it depend when my period starts and how I respond to the drugs, and they don’t understand once I’ve had egg collection why I’m not pregnant straight away, I feel like I’m bagging my head against a brick wall!
If I had a female member of staff it would be so much easier as these two men have no idea how the female body works!
Anybody else had anything similar with their employers or any advice they can give me??
Maria xx |
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| CKJ |
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| Joined: 15 Feb 2012 |
| Posts: 491 |
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 3:43 pm |
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Hi Maria
Do you have an occupational department within your organisation? If so, it may be beneficial to do a self-referral and they will then advsie your manager of any adjustments that might be needed.
Another option is to speak to your HR Department and see if there is a Policy and Procedure in place for IVF treatment (where I work we can get up to five days of paid special leave to cover the first full cycle of extraction and multiple implantations). They may also be able to talk to your manager for you to make him understand.
Last option is giving them some literature to read that will help them understand the process and what is involved.
I can understand how embarrassing it must be for you... are there no female reps in your organisation?
Hope the above helps - let me know how you get on!
C xx |
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_________________
Good luck during your IVF journey. Sending you lots of PMA and truckloads of (sticky) baby dust your way xoxox
Noah - our little miracle born on 24.01.13 xx |
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| LottieH |
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| Joined: 23 Mar 2009 |
| Posts: 640 |
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 4:57 pm |
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| Hmm, not a good situation ... I had the same with my boss and even though he told me he had friends who'd been through treatment he still wanted exact dates - however I'm a a bit blunt with things like this and men so just told him outright - trust me, when you start explaining that it depends on your period and day one being the day of full flow their eyes will start to go wide and they'll (probably) stop asking you silly questions. You just have to patiently explain that it's all variable and even you don't know what's going to happen when and the best you can do you'll let them know as soon as you do. I agree with CKJ about giving them some literature on protocols or suggesting they look it up on the internet. Best of luck, Lx |
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| maria84 |
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| Joined: 21 Jan 2012 |
| Posts: 239 |
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Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2012 8:08 am |
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I'll have a word with the HR department see if i have any luck with them, we dont seem to have a female rep in our area,
I just have to be blunt and say it how it is despite my embarrassment i guess,
Thanks for you advice ladies
xx |
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_________________
Me 28 DH 32
TTC 4 years,
i have a child from a previous relationship
1st icsi may 2012
bfp june 2012
edd 04/2/13
Joel born 07/01/2013 |
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| CKJ |
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| Joined: 15 Feb 2012 |
| Posts: 491 |
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Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2012 9:33 am |
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When you speak to your HR Deoartment it may also be useful to ask if they have a list of the Union reps in your organisation as they would be aware if there is a female one.
One other thing I did think of is to give them a copy of your protocol?
Good luck!
C xx |
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_________________
Good luck during your IVF journey. Sending you lots of PMA and truckloads of (sticky) baby dust your way xoxox
Noah - our little miracle born on 24.01.13 xx |
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| maria84 |
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| Joined: 21 Jan 2012 |
| Posts: 239 |
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Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2012 3:26 pm |
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i will do thanks very much,
i am goin on short protocol just waiting on my details to come out, i just dont like talkin to men about it, i had laparoscopy and a miscarriage last year and had to have a meeting about it with a male union rep & manager and it wasnt handled very well so just dreading this, have a meeting in the morning with my manager, so gonna print some info from the internet tonight that might help
xx |
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_________________
Me 28 DH 32
TTC 4 years,
i have a child from a previous relationship
1st icsi may 2012
bfp june 2012
edd 04/2/13
Joel born 07/01/2013 |
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| LottieH |
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| Joined: 23 Mar 2009 |
| Posts: 640 |
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Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2012 5:55 pm |
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Got my fingers croosed for you  |
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| CKJ |
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| Joined: 15 Feb 2012 |
| Posts: 491 |
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Posted: Fri Mar 16, 2012 10:00 am |
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I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriage (((((hugs))))) and the last thing you probably needed was that meeting with them...
I hope your meeting this morning went better and that it was very productive.
I work in HR so if you do want to ask me any questions etc. about your choices then please let me know - I'd be more than happy to help.
xxx |
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_________________
Good luck during your IVF journey. Sending you lots of PMA and truckloads of (sticky) baby dust your way xoxox
Noah - our little miracle born on 24.01.13 xx |
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