CARE Fertility Bulletin Board

nicster · 19 Aug 2010

Wibbly, dont you dare give up on your dream ! I know you are feeling negative at the minute but that will pass, you would allways regret it if you didnt try again and although theres nothing to say it will work theres also nothing to say it wont work. Look at Rod Steward and Penny Lancaster, it took them three ivf attempts to work and lets face it they must have access to the best treatment possible.

Why dont you take some more time out, wait till after christmas. I think thats what I am going to do, Ive got too much going on at the minute with the building work on the house and I just think doing it before christmas would be too much pressure and I cant think off a worse time to be taking the drugs or on the two week wait or worse still coping with a BFN ! so new year, new start, new baby Smile

.

Dont take too much notice of tarot readers hun, I saw one once, it was when me and DH were going through a really bad patch, she painted such a black picture and said we would definately split up and probably within a matter of months, well we didnt, we lived to tell the tale and we r probably happier now that we have been in a long long time.

Chin up Hunny, sending you some positive vibes.

Nicster x

Stella Star · 24 May 2010

Hi ladies,

It's amazing to see that similar change is happening in all of us.

After what happened, I was so desperate for the pain to go away, and I was trying to stay strong and was angry when I felt depressed or felt that horrible pain in my heart. Well, my emotional war caused real havoc with my body and my body just said ENOUGH! For last days of last wk I felt so down and achey, I woke up with my face covered in cold sore on saturday and I just felt like sleeping. My body was obviously fighting something. When my friend saw me, and I told her how I felt, she told me off (in a very nice way) for not allowing myself enought time to grieve, to be hard with myself. So I let go of trying to stay in control, of being concerned what others thought, Had a little 'breakdown' sat, but in a strange way I feel better. I just realised that rushing into another go would be worst thing I could do. So I decided to take it slowly, let things fall into slots themselves rather than pushing them there...
Think with all appointments I have it would not be possible to 'make it all' in time for new start in november, so decided (as yourself ladies - but for different reasons) to wait till next year. It would be great to have good news for Christmas, but then, it could be bad one as well.....

Hel - I know how you feel. Hope you are ok xxx Smile

Wibbly - I agree with Nicster, don't give up on your dream because of reading!!! I was told so many times (in a readings) that at the end of my treatment I will have a baby - and look! Out thoughts can be so strong, that we can change course of our lives. If you start believing that you should stop trying because you have been told that, then you will make it happen. Dont forget that closure can mean MANY things and not necessarily mean closure of your 'treatment'!!! I kow you feel very down now, but don'g give up yet. Maybe just give yourself time (as i was told) to process everythign that you've been throuh and be kind to yourself. xxx I wish I could hug you right now..... Sending you love lady. xxx Laughing

Nicster - I think that to wait is probably better for you as well. Think you need to have nice relaxed atmosphere and with builders and dust it's impossible. Sending you love too. xxx Laughing

xxx

Looks like last weekend brought changes into many of us.... Must be something in the air Wink

xxx

Hope you all have a nice day.

xxx S xxx

wibblywobbly · 09 May 2010

Good afternoon my wonderful, darling lovely buddies - and THANK YOU! What would i do without you - thanks for telling me it's all bollox! Which of course i know it is, but just needed someone to give me a kick up the bum! I don't know about waiting until next year though! Want it NOW!

Stella, thanks for the virtual hug, really needed it, feeling like you, a bit insecure, unloved, tired, sad, fed up!

Nicster - I'm glad your reader got it wrong - bet mine will have too. I have no intention of giving up yet, and no intention of anything bad happening with me and DH, i love him too much and i know he loves me too much too!

I wish we could meet, i think we'd be great friends all of us.

Take care. Sending you lots of love xxx

Stella Star · 24 May 2010

Hi Wibbly,

Think you are in Manchester. So am I.
If you feel like meeting - her I am....
Just let me know and I can send you my personal contact.

on the other hand if you prefer not to, that's fine too.....

xxxx

Hel75 · 13 Apr 2010

Wibbly,
Don't need to add to whats been said as it sounds like you've already been talked round!! Agree with Stella though, wish we could all hug you to reassure you. Think we're all still feeling it from last BFNs, I've spent most of the weekend in tears stressing about next cycle and paying if we need anymore after... Then just thought, "get a grip!!!!" realised i'm stressing before its even happened!!
Hope you're all okay, love to all xxxxxx

Stella Star · 24 May 2010

Hi Hel,

I can't tell you how much I understand (and I bet we all do) how you feel.
Sometimes I want to scream - in a middle of shopping centre or on the street:

s..t!!! and keep repeating it until I need to.... But I'm weird as it is, don't need to add to it....

Embarassed

Here, have one of my big hugs... LOVE xxx s xxx

starbright · 10 Jun 2010

Hi all. Nice to catch up with you all. We all got to keep positive and keep trying. Well We have our review on Wed. Just going to go with the flow as the last cycle, I kept planning what date Id start, when Id test and none of it went to plan so going take it day by day. Hopefully we will start end on this year or beginning of next. Really fed up today as I have found out my two best friends are pregnant within the last three days. Worse bit, they are due when i would have been so have a constant reminder now, Makes me feel sick deep in my stomach. Just feel I have nothing in common now as am the odd one out . xx

Stella Star · 24 May 2010

Hello everyone,

How are you today? Where is everyone hiding? Laughing

Starbright - I know (as I am sure all of us) how you feel. Hope your appointment went well today. Let us know. xxx

Me personaly - I am getting myself together. Taking each day as it comes. Trying to be good to myself. However, that doesn't include loads of chocolate, cheesecake and icecream Rolling Eyes

Just trying to eat healthily, swapped to organic milk and joghurts... My friend loaded me with homeopatic remedies and just waiting for them to kick in now.
It is autum solstice on thursday and full moon at the same time.... It feels like lot is going on, and people around me can feel it. If you feel bit under the weather, change inside you - it can be because of that. Neutral

Booked day off on Friday, not sure what I am doing yet - something nice!!!

Look forward to hear from you soon.

XXX LOL S XXX

Hel75 · 13 Apr 2010

Hi Ladies,
Hope you're all well nothing really to report... getting drugs delivered fri, so as soon as af arrives, we're off....!!!!
Stella- have a great day Friday whatever you decide to do!
Starbright - Hope appointment went well.
Wibbly - how you feeling now?
Love to everyone else too!
Hx

betsy1 · 15 Aug 2010

Hi all

we had our appointment today and all I can say at the moment is aaarrrggghhhh why oh why can't people just get things right and do their jobs properly!!!!
For the first time today we were told that as well as my DH slow and low count I had very few folicles!!! we asked when we were being scanned at the start of our last cycle what was a normal number and were told that there is no such thing as normal but we were ok. it turns out that actually due to my age I should have had between 15 and 20 folicles and on my scan they only saw 9 (nice of them to tell us!!!) because of this we were put on a very high level of drugs (again not knowing what is normal we did not know we were on a high amount) it now turns out that if you are on a high level of Menopur the LSH in it combined with the natural LSH in your body can cause a sort of overdose effect, effecting the quality of the eggs which is what it may have done to us (only 1 grade 2 , 2 garde 3's and 1 that had to be thrown away). I am just really cross that this was not discussed with us as we would have been more prepared!!!!

oh well it is done now and we will be on a different drug for the next cycle, however next problem day 40 no AF!!!! we have done tests all BFN so it is just a waiting game. if nothing happens in the next two weeks care will scan to see what is going on. It just means that our plan to start again in October now looks very unlikely and care told us today that if we did not start by the end of October, due to the Christmas shut down it will be the new year before we can start again. Sad

wibblywobbly · 09 May 2010

Evening girls. sorry not been on for a few days, i am mega busy at work and to boot, am applying for jobs, cos feel i need a change of scenery. I have decided i can't put my whole live of hold waiting to become pregnant and need to feel happy elsewhere in my live, so what will be will be. Chances are that if i get a new job, i'll get pregnant too, so will have to decide - which of course will be no decision at all, but at least i've edged my bets!!!

Stella hun, i'm under Notts Care, but live in leicestershire so even further away from you. otherwise i would have been there with bells on!!

Hel, i think like most of us there comes a point when you think, blow this, time to get real, get a grip and get going! I have not been in a good place, as you all know, but have now turned a corner - you have too, and your time is coming babe.

Starbright, how did your review go hun? hope you got some good feedback and know where you need to go next??? thinking of you. x

Betsy, i questioned about the high dose of menopur this time and whether the fact that i am always ready for collection on day 8 of period, meant that i was ready too early, thereby meaning my eggs weren't great quality - they said that it is better to be ready earlier and not stimming for too long. they've changed me to LP this next cycle as they have said that in some women, it improves egg quality - not for certain, but in some women. Did you do LP or SP last time? Betsy, not sure why Care have told you to start before end oct, we will not be starting until day 21 next AF, which will be mid Nov. So stimming towards end of Nov, and then EC early Dec, ET prob around 4/5 Dec then OYD by 20-22 Dec. so all in before Xmas, they've said that is fine. It may be that they've said that cos my periods are very regular. In fact it is exactly 28 days today since i started red bleed last time, so bang on time.

AFM, started AF today, so i could go from day 21 of this cycle, but not going to, will wait another month, still need more time, so having it. Also need to lose the stone i've put on!!! Fat lump that i am LOL!

Sending you all lots of love and positivity for your next go!!! xxx

starbright · 10 Jun 2010

Hi all
Hope everyone is doing ok
Betsy: sorry today was upsetting. keep hanging in there. I never thought about christmas shut down. They never mentioned that to me,

Well review went ok. Just waiting my first proper AF, then we can start on my next AF. Got given the protcol and the prescription so got everything ready to go. Wanted to do a natural cycle but they didnt recommend it so said a drug cycle was best as they could control me more so came home with a loads of tablets, pessaries and injections, It just fills me with dread putting all them in my body again. Not looking forward to it but I will just have to put up and shut up if I want the end results. I felt so chilled today but since I come out of there, I feel so panicky again and think why am I setting myself up for a big fall probably christmas week but on the other hand cant see the point in putting things off.
xxxx

starbright · 10 Jun 2010

i do worry though that all these drugs are not natural and do they do more harm than good xx

betsy1 · 15 Aug 2010

Hi Wibbly I am usually on the dot too, never had any lateness before so not really sure what is going on this time. I am also getting a very funny taste in my mouth (another clasic sign of pregnancy) but consistantly testing BFN. Care have said we have to start end of Oct as it will be 4 weeks of jabs as before and so that would be the end of Nov with collection at the beginning of Dec.

I don't really mind what has happened as we would have gone with what they sais anyway it is just the fact that we were not told. I really feel that a conversation should have taken place saying "this is what we have found, this is what we plan to do and these are the potential risks/ consequences". I don't think it would have changed anything we would just have been more prepared. We constantly asked questions throughout and were told that all my results were good!!

Anyway what's done is done. we just have to look forward now. Hopefully AF will sort itself out soon and we will have better luck next time on the other drug (can't remember what is it called now) have it written down somewhere!!!!

nicster · 19 Aug 2010

Hi Girls,

Sorry I havent posted for a few days, back in that doom and gloom place. All our money is being swallowed up by this bloody building work, wish we'd never started it ! DH is working every hour god sends so is exhausted and has turned into the most miserable man on the planet, he fell out with me big style last night because it was jacket potatoes for tea !!!! We havent spoken about the next attempt for ages and I,m beginning to thnk that he's changed his mind. Starting to think that we r never going to be able to try again. Got my review a week on monday so I'm just hoping that will reignite something in him !

Sorry girls, moan over ! hope you are all feeling ok, I'm really excited for those of you that are starting again soon.

Nicster xx

betsy1 · 15 Aug 2010

Nicster really sorry to hear you are feeling done. hopefully your DH is just stressed and trying to deal with things the best way he can. I am sure he will not have changed his mind completely and you will get your chance again. Maybe he is just as worried as you about bringing it all up at such a difficult time.

fingers crossed anyway. try and keep as possitive as you can for your review next week (hopefully yours will be better than mine!! Smile

)

Betsy x

nicster · 19 Aug 2010

Hi betsy, thanks for that Hun. Must admit I am looking forward to the review, I want a few answers myself about why our fertilisation rate was so poor this time and why they saw alot of eggs that were dark and granulated ! I think u r right, sometimes they know olot more than they let on, ut I think we have a right to know the full picture !

Ihows everyone else today ?

Nicster x

wibblywobbly · 09 May 2010

Hi girls, how are you all?

Nicster hun, how you feeling now? Soon be review day, try and stay positive. Sending you lots of hugs hun. xx

AFM - i'm doin gok i think. Still a bit sad now and then. We've decided to go again after Christmas. We worked out our dates and DH is very worried about me getting a result that we realy don't want just before Xmas, if we could guarantee the BFP rather than the other nasty thing, we'd go for it, but because we can't he doesn't want us to be miserable at a time of year when everyone else is happy. Sooo, i've decided with DH's support, that life must go on and have started applying for new jobs. I feel i need to refocus myself and stop worrying about the what ifs. In my life, i tend to find that if i go after a couple of things i want i.e. if i get a new job, i'll end pregnant as well, cos it seems i'm not allowed to have both!!! So im edging my bets LOL!

Hope you're all ok and having a nice weekend. xxx

nicster · 19 Aug 2010

Hi Wibbly,

Thanks for the cyber hug hun, think I feel a bit better. Dh mentioned the treatment last night, he was talking about the review and all the questions he's going to ask, he's also been taking the menevit religiously so thats made me feel a bit better to know that he hasnt forgotten about IVF comploetely.

I'm really glad youve decided to leave it till after christmas to try, I think your hubby is right, they were my reasons too, oh yes and the small matter of the house looking like a building site. Hopefully we'll be doing it at the same time and can be cycle buddies and I,m going to be really positive here and say new year new babies !!

Fingers crossed for you with the job thing, it will be really good for you to have that to focus on.

Big hugs to everyone else, hope youve all had a good weekend and your doing ok.

Nicster xx

Hel75 · 13 Apr 2010

Hi all,
Nothing to report, just wanted to say hi!! Hope you've all had a good weekend.
Wibbly - think having something else to focus on will be a good thing! I did my science gcse during my first cycle and found it a good distraction!!!
Nicster - i too keep dipping in and out of that doom and gloom place, guess its inevitable after all that us ladies are going/ have been through... Big hugs to you x
Betsy - soory you had a rough appointment, hugs to you too x
Starbright - you ready to go again? Not sure i feel ready.. just waiting for AF to arrive (beg oct) and then start the HRT tablets and see what a psycho they turn me into!!!!! Laughing

Anyone been on them for a FET??
Anyway, love to all...
Hel x

leepooh · 12 Apr 2010

Hey Ladies

Sorry i haven't been on in a while I have been in hospital, got home today and thank god. Only down side is its looking like to be March or April before we can start again I need to heel. Not been good had to have my right ovary removed my so called friend and I had a argument and sorry to say she put a knife in my tummy everything is ok apart from ovary, she has been charged with ABH.

Been to see care today and everything is ok just need time to heel still got my review next Tuesday.

Hope everyone is doing ok xxx

Leeann xxx

nicster · 19 Aug 2010

Oh my god leepooh that's awful, what sort of friend is that ! U must have had such an awful time, sending u lots of hugs Hun, hope u r feeling better soon x

Nicster

nicster · 19 Aug 2010

Hi hel, thanks for the hug, feel a bit better today, just can't wait to get the review over and done with. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you this time Hun, just need ur af to arrive and then all systems go. I don't know anything about the hrt tablets but it can't be as bad as all those injections, ull be fine.

Nicster x

Hel75 · 13 Apr 2010

God Leeann, thats terrible, hope you are okay x

leepooh · 12 Apr 2010

Thanks LLadies Im getting there now.

Not the friend I thought she was.

I m still in shock about what she did.

Leeann xxx